Don't Cry, Try Karezza

Post-coital blues brings you down, even when you thought the way up looked good.

For a long time over this past year, I struggled with what is known as post-coital blues.  A lot of women experience this, and surprisingly, it isn't talked about more.  In fact, as I have experienced this over the past year with a regular sex life, I initially felt very out of my mind and crazy, like I was a unique sexual defect.  Crying, severe tension, and headaches after sex, and resulting irritation, less enthusiasm or even depression about life in general, and anxiety about the relationship or myself- all things I had experienced in a matter of two months into the relationship.

My current relationship could have stressed to the point of separation if I hadn't reexamined our sex life when I was struggling with post-coital blues in the first few months of our relationship.

Emotional pain is good information!  I don't think partners should be under the constant watch of depression, anxiety, fear, and tension.

Everyone wants to appear as the Superman or Wonder Woman in bed.  When you admit to yourself that you are merely a depressed, unsatisfied person, it can be more of a let down for yourself than for the other person.  It was painful for me to tell my partner that, yes, I felt awful, sad, distressed, and I wasn't satisfied sexually with how things were going.  But before I could start healing, I became very honest about what I was experiencing, and open to the possibilities of different physical choices.

Conventional sex doesn't satisfy me deeply, but it doesn't mean I can't be satisfied in sex at all.  Having consistent gloomy results doesn't have to deter you from finding a new way.  

My experience with post-coital blues taught me that I needed a change.  Many women are seeking help.

With so many women experiencing problems in a natural activity, this perhaps shows that we have been taught to  do this natural activity in an unnaturally taxing way.  Up to 70% of women have shown to experience post-coital blues at least once in their life, and out of that group, 30% experience it consistently.  Many women in the world are shy and  not used to talking about their sex openly, so these numbers could be even higher.  Although many women experience PCB, it is not natural; it is not naturally healthy to be continuously unhappy.
   

The majority of our issues stem from unsatisfied emotional needs.  Having truly satisfying sex is a part of the foundation for our emotional experience.   Healing needs to take place everywhere: your heart, your feelings, your thoughts, your sexual choices, your relationship, your self-awareness, and keeping away from orgasm.

I believe Karezza saved my relationship from falling into a useless death.  I feel that our relationship could have easily crumbled if my partner hadn't already read Cupid's Poisoned Arrow and suggested me reading it.

After having a few solid weeks of backing off orgasm for myself, trying slower sex, and having sex not as frequently as before, it amazes me that I ever questioned the love in my relationship.  I feel so much hope now for us- for life.

Being honest with what works and what doesn't will help.  For example, I found that when we went too fast having sex, I often did not feel much and I had a hard time feeling any pleasure.  It is often better when healing from PCB to be much more gentle, and abstain from sex for awhile. The better way to heal is focus on holding hands, soft kisses, tender touch..  These can be too much, and you may try allowing your partner to be touched by you.  Not expecting anything, just allowing you to touch them how YOU want.  An experiment for you.

What I would like for you to know is that there is practical advice surrounding Karezza which will help any woman feel more secure about her relationship and her sex life. 

So...

Understand that post-coital blues is a REAL phenomenon and you don't have to feel ashamed.  It is based on the chemical rollercoaster-drug that is orgasm and not having enough relaxation from tension in your body.  Educate yourself about Karezza.